Timber-lee Garbage Cans/Thoughts

Note: This is my assignment I was supposed to do for Lindsay like 6 months ago. Haha.  A story about an object or creature. It had to take place at Timber-lee and needed to be a fable. I don’t really know if this is exactly a fable. (And really...its not good. hahah) But its based off of what I was thinking about today.

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After being dumped in all morning by a mob of sticky fingered, snot nosed, children the crowd finally died down. The girls that stood behind me took a break to eat breakfast and soon after I knew what would happen. They would come by, dragging Bertha, and then the cups, and then the silverware away. I didn’t bother saying goodbye; I’d see them in three hours.

Sometimes I was taken straight back to the dumpster. Today it wasn’t just me that needed to be dumped, Charlie needed to go out too. The girl that normally takes me out back got distracted by other things and we were forgotten, yet again, the bags of wasted apples, biscuits, sausage patties, and other cumbersome breakfast items were heavy and I was ready for them to be out.

After quite some time, Charlie and I were dragged out the double doors. To my dismay, Charlie was taken first and in the process I was spun around and faced my reflection for the first time. I gazed at myself and was dismayed at my appearance. My lid was dark and slightly ajar, there were stains from this breakfast and previous meals smeared on my front, and my name was scrawled crooked. Roscoe was fading.

Suddenly I felt an overwhelming feeling of self-pity and uselessness wash over me. I watched the tables get washed each day, when I wasn’t facing the wall that is. The cups, the cup wracks, the silverware cart, and the tray cart came back after each meal, clean and rejuvenated. I was given evidence of how I was always the forgotten one.  Bitterness crept into my heart as I thought of those that had it better off than I did, getting washed five times a day and how my sole purpose was to contain people’s rejected meals. Why couldn’t I have a better purpose?

I stewed in my pool of negativity as the empty Charlie was returned, and I was emptied and brought back only for the endless cycle to contain. We were both taken back in and she put new white bags. Then she darted off and Roscoe and I were left alone to talk about the morning. (Salvador was there too, but he is mute.) Before I had the chance to pour my bitter thoughts out on him he said something.

“I want to share something with you Roscoe. This morning while you were being taken to the dumpster, I saw my reflection for the first time.”

I wanted to interrupt with my own thoughts but something inside me stopped to listen.

“I was thinking about how we don’t have the tidiest and most fun job out of all the things in the dining rooms.” Charlie sighed, “But if we didn’t exist; if we were, say, a table instead of a trashcan, there would be no place for the kids to throw their trash away and the whole place would be a mess. Everybody has a purpose, Roscoe.” (The End)

Random possibly unrelated thoughts:

I don’t like what Im doing right now. I am exhausted with both of my jobs. I have never felt more distant with everyone that’s in my life, no matter how close I am to them geographically. I haven’t been writing. I feel stuck. And it’s tiring…I want to quit so bad.

But I know there’s a reason I am where I am. And there is a reason I am going through what I am going through. It sucks. But I am going to use it to give God glory. Or try my hardest to do that. I am not giving up.

That is all.

The Happy Hot Dog

Saddona, Sadstate was a sad, sad town. The town folk spent their days scrubbing toilets and picking up endless piles of dog poop from the groups of wild and unfriendly beagles that came through town multiple times a day. They ate nothing but Broccoli and spinach sandwiches. The never hugged their family members and they didn’t have any loveable furry pets. They all wore black trench coats and black socks with poorly crocheted black hats. The grass stayed an unhealthy brown and the trees were bare. It rained all the time and stayed a frigid temperature of 33.5 degrees.

But one magical day, an egg fell from the sky and into a soft bush full of barbeque sauce. The egg was small and a light shade of violet. It was bumpy to touch and smelled like cotton candy. The citizens all had an equal amount of hatred for barbeque sauce, so they never  noticed the unusual mystery egg.

The egg grew a little each day in length and finally, on the fourteenth day the precious egg cracked, and a hot dog was born. The hot dog was long and beautiful, he had smooth red skin and was wrapped in a fluffy tan and white bun. Immediately, upon opening his eyes, the rain stopped raining in Saddona, for the first time in forever.

Citizens working outdoors with the poo, stopped for a moment and took a long puzzling look at the sky. They didn’t understand. The gray clouds were rolling and a large yellow orb was revealed. They were shocked. They knew of the sun, but they had never seen it so bright and beautiful. They never saw the sky such a beautiful blue.

The grinning hot dog lifted himself up and peered at the inside of the pale purple shell. He was about 13 inches tall and had bony stick-like limbs. He walked the dreary sidewalks and instantly the grass changed from an ugly stale yellowish color and turned lush, soft, and green.

“MY NAME IS WINSTON, AND I LOVE LIFE!” the hot dog cried. He began to run all around Saddona and after an hour of running, the whole town was warmer, up to an unusual sixty four degrees. The town folk both picking up poop and scrubbing toilets were all outside, pondering the new climate for a moment. Even the beagles stopped running and pooping and looked up at the sky and at the beautiful grass. Flowers started popping up, Daffodils, tiger lilies, roses, and violets; Tulips, daises, Peonies and every other possible flower that anyone could ever imagine filled the town, making it look lovely and colorful.

Sadman Saddington, the town mayor, was puzzled and decided to call a meeting. All townsmen and the beagles came and sat in the town hall and waited for the mayor’s explanation. The mayor stood at the podium for a moment, still puzzled and trying to think of what he could say, when all of a sudden, Winston knocked on the town hall door.

An old man, named Don opened the wooden door and Winston burst in the room and skipped jovially to the podium. He hopped on top of it and screamed  at the people.

“I love life!”

Instantly, the beautiful joyfull hot dog brought smiles to the peoples’ faces. They looked at one another and grinned.

For the first time in their entire lives they felt overwhelming urges to hug their families. Even the beagles smiled, wagged their tails, and each of them found a family to be a part of. Children were laughing, women were giggling, and men were chuckling. They all high fived and started smacking each other joyfully with fish.

Winston laughed along with them and gave Sadman Saddington a fist pump. Winston then broke out in an upbeat peppy tune, and the whole town began to square dance. They danced until the wee hours of the night until they could dance no more. Instead of going back to their homes, they had a sleep over and slept comfortably on the town hall floor, talking about life until they fell asleep.

Things finally began to change in Saddona. No longer did the people have to pick up endless piles of poop. They decided that the toilets were clean enough and got real jobs. They followed their dreams and reached their potential. Families laughed and hugged each other often, they played games like twister every night instead of sitting alone in their rooms and reading the dictionary before bed time.

Meanwhile Winston the joyful hot dog continued to spread joy around the town. He laughed constantly and when he wasn’t proclaiming his love for life, he was writing songs about it and singing them to everyone he met.

At night, while the citizens slept Winston worked endlessly on knitting each of the members of the town a new outfit. Cheerful red shirts, bright pairs of yellow pants, and perfectly knit purple hats. He gave out the outfits every day and that made Saddona even more bright and sunny and joyful.

Mayor Saddington announced at the next meeting through his deep chuckle that Saddona would no longer be called Saddona and he would no longer be called Sadman Saddington. Saddona was now Joyston and he was now to be addressed as Sir Carl.

Each and every day there was a new joy discovered. Slip and Slides. Roller rinks. Snow. Changing leaves. Four leaf clovers. Hopscotch. Scrapbooks. Wool Blankets. Petting Zoos. Mattress Pads. Monopoly. Hungry, Hungry Hippos. Kittens. Beagle puppies. Roller Coasters.

One thing Winston showed the townfolk that they rejected, was new food. They were purely content with their broccoli and spinach sandwiches. Winston just shook his hot dog head, smiled, and screamed, “I LOVE LIFE!”

On one fateful day, an outsider came to town. She was on a road trip and got hungry, and was in search for a place to eat. It was eight p.m. and Winston was taking a nap in the barbeque bush. The hungry woman, whos name was callie, drove around Joyston and looked for a place that served something other than spinach and broccoli sandwiches. She almost gave up when she suddenly got a whiff of sweet smelling barbeque sauce.

She pulled over, enticed by the smell, and found the barbeque bushes. She peered down in them and saw the tastiest looking hot dog she had ever seen sleeping in a purple shell. She nudged the hot dog and Winston awoke instantly with a grin.

“Hi, my name is Winston, I LOVE LIFE.”

Callie grinned back at the tasty slab of meat and bun and got out her and mustard packets. She picked Winston up and he continued to smile, thinking she just wanted a hug.

She smeared the condiment on Winston.

“Gee, thanks, I’ve always thought I look great in yellow!” Winston started to sing one of his songs but before he could get to the chorus, Callie had bitten off his lower half.

Winston winced, wondering how he would skip after he had no legs, but his love for life overwhelmed the slight worry.

Callie continued to eat. Winston continued to smile. When Callie got to the last bite he cried out one last time, “My name is Winston, and I love-“

Callie chewed the hot dog, got in her car, and continued on to her destination.

The End.

Writing Stories With Brit and Em

Tyler Lentil is a lonely depressed college kid who lives with his mom and her pet goose, Marvin the twelfth. There is much tension in the apartment. Ever since Tyler's father, Willy was admitted into the mental institution for publicly eating a robin illegally Marvin started biting Tyler's fingers and toes angrily in the night. Tyler became forced to wear baseball mits on his hands and oven mits on his feet. Marvin only showed aggression toward Tyler but remained affectionate toward his mother, Johannah.

Tyler had never traveled out of Florida until a great catastrophe came upon his Grandparents in Mostacholigrain, Wisconsin. Their beloved bilingual dog, Charlie was accidentally murdered by Mayor Tiki Sinclair, who was so overecome with grief that he jumped off a building.. (A/N: Yes, I know, intense)

So Tyler went to the french speaking dog's funeral and despite the somber event, he fell in love Mostacholigrain, Wisconsin.

One day, in Winn-Dixie. Noelle as singing about mayonnaise while juggling oranges. She tripped on a pineapple and the oranges flew recklessly into the air onto an unexpecting Tyler, who is stroking a baby llama, who thinks Tyler is his grandmother.

Noelle passes out. When she wakes up there is a can of frozen broccoli that Tyler retrieved from the bathroom freezer on her head. The llama is staring at her while Tyler vigourously fans her with a pineapple.

"I hattte Texas!" Noelle moans.

"I hate Texas too," Tyler agrees. "BUT, I LOOOVE Wisconsin."

"I LOVE WISCONSIN TOO!"

Two years later.....

((TO BE CONTINUED!))

Eddie, Rodreico, LLAMA!

Note: This is the direct result of being kind of sleepy and spastic...Yeah. I do these writing prompts things when I'm bored and this is how this one turned out.

Creative Writing Prompt # 96

Description: You come home and check your messages. You get to your third message and freeze. Begin from there.

Eddie McMilliganson entered his large empty home with a frown on his face and tear in his left eye. It was a sad day. Bernie, the executive of his fancy-pantsy law firm was let go for stealing a young man's polish hot dog. Bernie was Eddie's best friend and it troubled him that Bernie would do such an immoral thing.

Eddie set his briefcase down on the marble counter and took his work jacket off and placed it neatly on the large antique coat hanger. Bernie touched the play button on his answering machine as he looked through his stack of mail he retrieved from the mailbox.

"You have FOUR new messages! Message one: "Hi Edward, this is Daphne. Daphne Wheeler from next door. I just want to let you know that your lawn was looking a little brown. You might want to put your sprinklers on in the morning before you go to work. Take care and say hi to Rodreico for me."

Instantly, Rodreico, Eddie's pet llama heard his name and came running into the kitchen. Eddie pat Rodreico on the head 3 times and then told it to go to bed. Rodreico somberly trotted back down the hallway to his bedroom. Rodreico was one of the smartest, most obiedient farm creatures in the whole state of Arkansas. Luckily, he was housebroken.

"Hello Mr. Milliganson, this is Wanda Pappermandoodle from Dr. Doople's office. I just wanted to remind you of your 3:45 appointment for Thursday. Please call in and confirm with me by tomorrow. Thank you."

Eddie was looking at his electric bill when the third message began.

"Eddie, this is your mother."

Eddie froze in his spot, dropped his jaw.

"Look, I know we're not supposed to be speaking considering we're in a horrible fight right now. But I just wanted to wish you a happy annual Hug-your-llama day! I hope you have a fun day with Rodreico and you can tell that mammal of yours that I love him and no longer hold the grudge that he ate my tuna sandwich. I love you son. Good-bye"

Instantly Rodreico sprinted to the kitchen. Eddie forgot about international hug-your llama day. No wonder Rodreico looked sad as he left the kitchen the first time. Eddie got down on his knees and gave Rodreico a good, long hug. He whispered into Rod's llama ear, "It's ok, Grandma forgives you about the tuna. She forgives you."

Rodreico gave Eddie a lick on the cheek and the two skipped back to Rod's bedroom. Eddie fed the llama, groomed the llama, and tucked the llama in for bed. He even sang him "Happy Llama day!" for his evening lullaby.

"Sweet dreams, Rodreico." Eddie left the door a crack open just in case Rod had nightmares. He tiptoed back to the kitchen where he called his mother back for the first time in 7 months 3 weeks and 4.3 days. They made up and Eddie promised to buy his mother a new tuna salad sandwich at lunch the following afternoon.

One Year Later

Eddie- married a woman named Sheila who happened to be a llama enthusiast.

Rodreico- No longer ate people's tuna sandwiches.

Eddie's mother- moved to Lithuania.

Bernie- was re-hired. He bought the young man a new polish hot dog and vowed to wear a sombrero on his head for the rest of his life.

And they all lived happily ever after. The End.

Radcliff Story 2006

Once there was a young lad by the name of Radcliff. He resided in the large picturesque town of Kenosha, Wisconsin. Radcliff loved Indiana with a passion. The reason why he loved it so much was because one time he went there with his father and walked into a grocery store called Ultra. Immediatly he knew the store and Indiana was his destiny.

Meanwhile one day Noelle was all somber in the store Ultra. She walked through the bakery, heartbroken because she missed the wonderful Woodman's in her beloved Kenosha, Wisconsin. Well, Radcliff was also in Ultra at that time. Unlike Noelle, he was all happy and joyus. He saw Noelle who was starting to sob sadly when she looked at the bumble bee tuna. He asked her,"Hey somber woman, why are you looking so gloomy? It's a wonderful store! Doesn't it smell terrific?"

Noelle started to respond until she looked up at him. He was the most gourgeous, beautiful, handsome boy she had ever seen. "Oh I just miss my favorite grocery store in the world." She replied sniffling.

"What are you talking about? This is the greatest grocery store in the world!" Radcliff responding excitedly.

"I disagree. Woodman's is the best," Noelle replied.

"WOODMANS?!" Radcliff was washed over with shock.

"Yes." Noelle nodded.

"I live right near a woodman's.The Kenosha Woodman's."

"No way. You're from wisconsin?"

"Unfortunately." Radcliff said.

"Why? You don't like it there?"

"No way. It's dumb. Indiana is the place to be." Radcliff said.

"You haven't lived here." Noelle said with disgust.

"Yeah well you havent lived in Wisconsin either. All they have is cows and cheese and cows. You guys have corn. I love corn."

"I hate corn. Cheese is awesome." Noelle said. Even though Radcliff was extremely good looking she also found him irritating. Just like she found her uncle Hugo who also prefered Indiana over Wisconsin annoying. How could they hate Wisconsin?

Suddenly Radcliff and Noelle's dads come running toward the two arguing strangers.

"Noelle, you'll never guess who I ran into!" Noelle's father, Jim exclaimed.

"Who?"

"This is Harry, my old friend from high school. He's an ice fisherman in Wisconsin."

"Harry's my dad!" Radcliff said.

"Is he hairy?" Noelle asked.

"A little."

"Ahhh..."

The time at the grocery store went by fast. After both Radcliff and Noelle's fathers were grocery shopping the two 16 and some odd month teens walked through the aisles of Ultra and talked about everything. Radcliff told Noelle about his pet fish, Gwenevierre back home. Noelle spoke of her cat Jack and how he likes to eat fish. Radcliff was frightened. When Radcliff had to go back to Wisconsin he started to cry. Noelle hugged him telling him she knew how he felt. They exchanged numbers when they seperated.

Yes, It was only the beginning.