30 things I'll Never Do

I got this idea from a Creative Writing Prompt site.

1.) I won't buy a ferret. Those things are long and slightly creepy. Although there was this one ferret at the Valpo Petland that was kinda cute. I pet it's head and it kept trying to crawl up my arm. But I still wouldn't want to buy one.

2.) Become a saxaphone player. I don't know why, but the saxaphone never seemed like an attractive instrument to me.

3.) Move to Alaska. I wouldn't be able to take bitter cold all the time. I am very sick of the cold right now.

4.) Hug a polar bear. Well, unless it's fake. But hugging a polar bear doesn't sound like a very good idea even if they do look cuddly.

5.) Marry a rich old guy for his money.

6.) Watch the show Lost. It looks really confusing and uncomfortable. I watched one episode at the fitness barn and it was kinda cool. But now it's way too complicated for me. Plus I watch the kid version of it, Flight 29 Down. And it was created first!

7.) I will never love Hannah Montana.

8.) Watch soap operas. I refuse to become addicted to soap operas. They're ridiculous and not clean at all.

9.) I will never love Great America the way I once did. I have tried but 2007 was really bad. There was too much advertisements and the new manager guy is taking out Splash Water Falls and Space Shuttle America- two of the rides that I had some of my fondest childhood memories on. AND, now there are new Disney sections in the gift shops. After much research I have discovered that Disney is evil. But that's a long story. We'll talk about that later.

10.) Go skydiving. Not because I'm afraid of jumping out of a plane, because I am afraid of hitting the ground with a huge SPLAT!

11.) I will never eat sushi. The whole concept of raw fish disturbs me to the highest extent.

12.) I won't eat out of a garbage can. That's gross.

13.) I won't ever become a nurse because I'd end up barfing every day from the gruesome things that they see. I hate blood and vomit.

14.) I will never go to a phychic fair. You see, every time Dad and I went to Kenosha we'd see this Days Inn that had a phychic fair every week. We always joked about going in but I would never do that because that's messing with really scary stuff. Plus they don't have the phychic fairs either.

15.) I will never stop loving Wisconsin even if I don't get to move there one day. (I can't believe I just wrote that.)

16.) I will never drive across railroad tracks when I see that there is a train coming. Railroad tracks scary the poop out of me. Trains scare me also. Oi.

17.) I will not be in the circus. Clowns frighten me.

18.) I won't bathe in Spinach.

19.) I won't get married in a foreign country or state. I'll either get married in the state that the guy and I live in or Wisconsin. Wisconsin will always be my first choice.

20.) I won't ever get another pet bird. The last one was attacked by my cat, Fred. Poor Wendel.

21.) I won't get a credit card and spend money that I don't have. I've seen what that does to some people and I don't want to be buried in debt.

22.) I won't go to a casino when I turn 21, no matter how curious I am.

23.) When I have kids I will not take them to arcades with tickets and stuff. I used to do that all the time when I was a kid and now I wish I could have the money I wasted on all those games. I could have bought the prize I got for a dollar. Except, Deal or No Deal is really fun.

24.) I won't collect my finger nail clippings or pencil shavings in a box. That's kinda creepy.

25.) NO PDA! (If I get married.)

26.) I will never buy a gun. That's not cool.

27.) I will never rob a gas station if I'm running low on cash.

28.) I won't hire a housekeeper, even if I'm rich. I should be able to clean up after myself.

29.) I will never become a professional juggler. Mainly because I don't even know if there's such a thing.

30.) I won't get a job just for the money.

There was supposed to be 50 but I have run out of ideas. Of course, I have a bunch of serious ones but I'll do those another day.