So I miss xanga. I was reading all my posts from never_let_go33 or whatever the site's name was and I really miss the way I used to blog. I found a poem I wrote about Meat. Those were such good days. I was at VCC. It was sophmore year and nothing was really going wrong in my life.

I feel like I am wandering around aimlessly in circles...alone. And does anyone understands how that makes someone feel? No. So it's harder to relate to friends and people in your life and then you end up saying something or doing something that upsets the person. Well in my case that's what I've done. I feel so incredibly disconnected from the world that was mine only two months ago.  My heart aches for the way it was. And I really don't think I can take it anymore. I need something to change. I'm going to save money so I can eventually move to Wisconsin and just start a new life.

And I normally don't mind being alone. Usually I like it. But that's how I've been lately and to be honest, I'm sick of it. And that's why I am really thinking of buying a kitten next time I have enough money. Dad can just deal with it. He's got his hooker girlfriend to deal with and I don't have anyone.

I have been able to talk to Katie Engel alot though. She's become a good friend. We enjoy ranting on each other. And Emily has been great through all this. =) Adair is there too but she has school and new friends and I understand that she can't always be there to hear my rants...

But yeah, I think I'm ready to go back to VCC. I miss Christy and other people. At Faith I didn't know anyone at all. Except for Marilyn...Oh yeah! Marilyn has been great! We totally relate to each other. Except sometimes she oversteps her boundries as a mother. I have a mother. Her name is Mary Ann and I love her even though she kinda drives me nuts.

Rant over.