Drained

Sometimes it feels like the only one who truly understands me is God. That's alright, but it gets annoying sometimes. I can't take this anymore. I feel like I'm holding a 1000 pound bucket and every ten minutes someone's throwing in another 10 pounds. I am so stressed and I feel like noone cares. It's just everything. School, friends, family, everything. I can't take it.

I think this is why I like Wisconsin. I don't have to deal with people, it's just me, God, and the beautiful nature. I feel free of my burden. Maybe it is just one big dreamland, but you know what? Who cares? I bet you all have Wisconsins. Places where you get away from all the stress for a little while. Only yours probaly isn't 300 miles away.

I don't know where I'm going in this note. I'm just sick of it all and ready to be somewhere else in my life.

Meanwhile I'm just gonna focus on God. And that's it. Because I don't want to be anyone but me and I'm not going to pretend like I'm okay when I'm not.

I am not keeping my Noelle-I'm-doing-ok mask on.

Beautiful Lyrics:

When the weight of all my dreams

Is resting heavy on my head,

And the thoughtful words of help and hope

Have all been nicely said.

But Im still hurting,

Wondering if Ill ever be

The one I think I am.

I think I am.

Then you gently re-remind me

That youve made me from the first,

And the more I try to be the best

The more I get the worst.

And I realize the good in me,

Is only there because of who you are.

Who you are...

And all I ever have to be

Is what youve made me.

Any more or less would be a step

Out of your plan.

As you daily recreate me,

Help me always keep in mind

That I only have to do

What I can find.

And all I ever have to be

All I have to be

All I ever have to be

Is what youve made me.