It would be so much easier to quit. 

It would be so much easier to hide and run away from my problems. 

It would be so much easier to be alone. 

I don't trust anyone. 

I don't even trust myself. 

I feel like I'm going crazy. 

It's sad that I was the forgotten one. Now that I think about it, it seems like that's always how it was. I was always the after thought. 

Too quiet and passive to be considered one of the group. Too quiet and passive for them to even know who I am. 

I am crazy and fun and random and spontaneous. 

I am an emotional, sensitive person that takes every careless word to heart and picks each one of them apart, running them over and over in my head until I can't do it anymore. 

I care alot about people. I try to make sure everyone feels loved and included. Even when I don't like someone I try to be kind. Even when people are mean to me and dont like me, I try to be kind. 

I have opinions. I have feelings. Just because I don't always speak my mind, doesn't mean I don't have one. 

I am comfortable with the way I live. Jeans and tshirts. Regular old shoes. I like the occasional necklace or pair of earings or nice shirt or cute shoes...but I'm pretty much a simple girl. I hate materialism...Yet I window shop. I look at all the useless items in useless stores and I get disgusted every time. I don't even know why I go to places like that...it just makes me sick. 

I want to help people. I want to see people. Not just walk down the street and pass them up without a thought. There are so many frowning angry sad lonely people out there and we can help just by making eye contact and smiling. Saying hello, how are you? 

Hearing how their day has been and really listening. 

Sometimes I think I've got it right...and then I see something in my life that I need to fix, that I need to work on. 

That's who I am...I've had a slight identity crisis since last year around this time. The hurt is still there. I'm up an down. I'm angry that I'm forgiving. I'm hurt and then I'm not. I'm inferior then superior. I can't take this anymore....

I hate this.